Loo-se Talk

So I met this young lady looking all sassy and smart. ‘Aunty, I follow your blog,’ she gushed. ‘I read it in the loo.'

Gauging my trifle disappointment she added, 'I mean it in the nicest possible way.'

I was a bit shaken. No, it was not the ‘A’ bomb. Once sporadic, the ‘A’ bomb is now hurled at me by aunties themselves. I don’t mind it at all.

It was the ‘Loo’ part that was the party Poo-per. I am trained to process words into images. For a moment, my words were clouded in a smelly fog of ablutions. I was wondering why read in the Loo? Do I Loo-k like a Loo-ny who indulges in Loo-se Talk? Do I Piss-off readers? Are my posts Pee-vish?

Relax, I told myself. Think. Why exactly are you upset?

Revisit your childhood. Remember those last minute revisions in the loo? When you can think about what you have written, or, what you are going to write in the privacy of the washroom, why sulk?

Newspapers have long accompanied people inside the loo. To judge the quality of writing by the place where it is read, rather than the effectiveness of its prose is to miss the trees for the woods. 

Then, where is the time to read? More importantly, where is the time to think? Archimedes, they say, figured out his theory of water displacement while soaking in a bath tub. Ideas can strike anywhere. Anytime. Given the noise pollution, toilets are not a bad place. Even Modi Ji is endorsing them.

Moreover, loo readers are a flourishing tribe. People carry newspapers, tablets, smart phones and Ipads to the Les Cabinets. A hot cup of tea and a juicy tabloid can do what a bottle of Cremaffin cannot. Why, even restaurants are being designed as toilets. Modern Toilet is a bathroom themed restaurant chain in Taiwan. A new restaurant opened in LA as recently as last month. So if you can eat in a toilet, you can certainly read in a toilet. Read Here

Anyway, what I write is not rocket science that needs a table lamp or a study table for finer assimilation. I can only hope that my words stay long after the reader is done with the toilet paper. If a gripping narrative results in easing things, even better.
By the time the party ended, I felt better. I even smiled at the young lady. 
In the loo or on the mountains, one reader is better than no reader at all.
Picture Courtesy: AFP News